Author Archives: Carlo Rossi

Tony Pena Jr Should Switch Positions

Seriously, the dude has a -1 OPS+ through 184 at bats this season.  As evidenced below, he has the ability to throw 90+ with some late break.  Couldn’t he find more employment opportunities as a reliever?

The sad thing is, this is probably the highlight of the season for the Royals.  Experience history, guys.

Chuggo back for more

Because I know you guys are riveted, I’ll let you know that Chuggo is now posting on Hipinion, the forum I frequent. Problem is, it’s a fake Chuggolug (probably). Honestly, do you really think there’s any chance Chuggz would know what to do in front of a keyboard?

Anyway, this is noteworthy because of this:

EDIT: There’s been some nasty rumors on said forum that Chuggo is facing some legal problems for spiking a lady’s drink.  Chuggz has an answer to these vicious allegations.  If there is a god, he will prove these e-mails to be real.  More updates to follow.

subject: thx from chuggz‏
From: Chuggo (chuggolug@gmail.com)
Sent: June 18, 2008 10:04:17 PM
To: Mr. Conductor (xxxxxx@xxxxx.com)

mr conduktr

thx 4 showin me dat hipinion.com/forms wnt me in. it means a lot 2 da chuggz.

sum of wat dey r sayin is fny and tru. its totly a difrent thng 2 pop pilz wit a ho b4 fukin her thn 2 force the bitch 2 take da pill. i dnt get the law.

ill leev u wit a ryme cuz ur frends lyk dem:

my lawyer likes to tell me
be quiet as a cat
u should do the same
when ur mouths around my gat

.chuggz

Euro 2008 Ladies Championship – Group D

Let’s hear it for nontraditional work schedules!

Or not.  Anyway, that is Ace’s excuse for not manning up and taking Group D, so I’ve assumed responsibility.  After this hopefully we’ll shit out a quarterfinal post by week’s end and we can wrap this shit up.  Group D contains Spain, Russia, Sweeden, and Greece.  Without further ado, the ladies:

Spain:

Russia:

Sweeden:

Greece:

And the table:

Spain
Sweden
Russia
Greece

And there ya go.  Thankfully, the quarterfinals are going to be taken care of in one post, so we are almost through with this shit.  The quarters will match up like this: Switzerland v Germany, Turkey v Croatia, Italy v Sweden, Spain v Romainia.

Also, on a spur of the moment decision the roster of writers for GetBoofed will be growing to four, so be on the lookout for that.

Some Marlins Bits

After some searching, I have finally found this gem of a picture of your Marlins opening day starter Mark Hendrickson, who was recently cemoted to bullpen duty along with fellow starter Ryan Tucker.  Anyway, before I get sidetracked, here is Mark Hendrickson in all his pre-MLB glory.  Allegedly this poster [minus the text, I assume] currently hangs in the Marlins clubhouse.

 Why the transition to bullpen duty, you ask?  For starters, opposing batters have been going all MJ on him as Hendrickson sported a 7.20 and 7.77 ERA, respectively, for the months of May and June.  Yes, that’s ERA’s of seven-plus from the man deemed by the coaching staff to have been the best available pitcher at the end of spring training – a 6’9″ former NBA journeyman.  Does he even have a major league pitching job if Randy Johnson wasn’t so tall?

Filling the roles?  Mediocre prospect Chris Volstad and Minneapolis native Josh Johnson, who returns after a year and a half of missed time thanks to Joe Girardi’s Baker-esque abuse (see: Anibal Sanchez) and a little thing I like to call “oh fuck me another Marlins pitcher is visiting James Andrews who will deem that he needs Tommy John surgery.”  You might remember Josh Johnson as being the dude who came onto the scene in that magical 2006 season and posted a 3.10 ERA in 157 innings – a figure which would have been good for 4th in all of baseball had he had enough innings to qualify.

I know I should set moderate expectations for Johnson’s return, but I just can’t bring myself to do it.  Between his return and Anibal’s possible August return – expect the Marlins to actually have some pitching and potentially end the year at .500 or above.  And hell, with no teams in the NL East displaying any desire to pull away with the division, could the Marlins even make a push for the playoffs?  Oh, and for those of you who are already firing up your calculators to comment on Florida’s pythagorean numbers and the fact that they’ve allowed more runs then they’ve scored: fuck you.  Please just let me enjoy my blind bliss for at least a couple days.

Also, I would just like to say that all of these other pitchers could be moot of Ricky Nolasco keeps playing like he has been.

Euro 2008 Ladies Championship – Group B

You’ve seen the rules. You’ve seen group A. Let’s carry on, shall we? Group B includes Germany, Croatia, Austria, and Poland.

Germany:

Croatia:

Since the first picture included 2 ladies, I don’t feel bad for this one only containing 2/3rds of a lady.

Austria:


So glad euro2008girls.com doesn’t post the age of the people they photograph……..

Poland:

As hard as it is for me to preclude the Austrians from advancing, I’m pretty sure the girls in that first picture are both 16. As much as I love that, I don’t want to go public with my support of that. Therefore, Croatia to win the group and Germany to advance as the second place finisher. Here is the table.

Group B:

Croatia
Germany
Austria
Poland

2008 Euro Ladies Championship – Group A

Kicking things off is a pretty wide open group containing Portugal, the Czech Republic, Turkey, and co-hosts Switzerland. Most of these images should let you click on them for a bigger version. Let’s get right to it:

Portugal:

thank you to euro2008girls.com


Czech Republic:

Turkey:

Lot of entrants in this one, but I’m paying the most attention to the two wingers at right.

It appears as if Lindsay Bluth/Funke is a Turkey supporter…  For reference sake, here is Lindsay:

Switzerland:

Well there ya go. A very strong first day showing. It’s quickly becoming clear to me that there are going to be no losers in this tournament. I’m going to have to give the Swiss hosts the nod for the group A win, which comes as a surprise to me, at least. A good initial showing, plus they have the depth to make some noise in this tournament. I think I’m going to have to go with the Turks for second, narrowly edging out the Portuguese. Despite their lush skin tones and chiseled physiques, the Portuguese ladies will end up leaving one a bit unsatisfied. They lack solid substance underneath all the glitz and glamor – amazingly similar to the football team they support. Anyway, lets get the official table:

Group A:

1. Switzerland
2. Turkey
3. Portugal
4. Czech Republic

Disagree with me? Let me have it in the comments.

Also, before anyone gives me flak for missing this photo, it came to my attention that it was taken at the Euro 2004 tournament (hence the presence of English fans in the background). Regardless, the photo still deserves to be on this blog, so here ya go, a little group A bonus.

Euro 2008 v 2.0 – The Ladies’ Championship

We here at Get Boofed are major advocates of taking a good thing and straight up overusing the shit out of it.  For that reason, we hereby present to you, our loyal reader(s), the GetBoofed Euro 2008 Ladies Championship.  The tournament will utilize the same formant and nations as the actual event, only the teams will be advancing based solely on the caliber of female fans they were able to get to Austria/Switzerland.

The group stages will last one day apiece, beginning with group A later today.  Winners will be chosen arbitrarily by us, with the possible exception of reader polling being done for the semis and the final.  Two pictures will be allowed per country during the groups, one a piece during the elimination rounds.  However, multiple girls in one picture is acceptable, and it will still only count as a single picture.  The same picture may not be used twice, and only genuine fangirl groupies and wannabe groupies will be allowed…none of this pompous WAG business.

One quick note.  Most of the material for this comes from the fine people at Euro2008girls.  They don’t know who we are, they don’t know that we’re doing this, and they surely don’t endorse this site.  That being said, they truly are doing the lord’s work over there, and we strongly recommend you check them out.

Anyway, let the games begin.  Check back later today for all the group A action.  And, to get the ball rolling, here are some ineligible famous fans.  Don’t let them cloud your judgment later in the tournament, I just had to somehow get them on this site.

Sylvie Van der Vaart – wife of Rafael

Sarah Brandner – girlfriend of German Bastian Schweinsteiger

Belen Rodriguez – Argentinian girlfriend of Italian Marco Borriello

Princess Maxima of the Dutch royal family